eve winchester’s Blog

a couple of days ago was a very tiring day for me @ work…but still manage to have some wonderful moments though ^^
…and why is that, u say? well, it goes like this…
as usual, I went to work in the morning trying my hardest not to think ’bout how I miss not seeing him a couple of days before @ work. When I arrived @ work, I met a nurse who told that there were a couple of patients in the icu.I was so excited that I gave a huge smile…n maybe a little sparkle in the eyes (if anyone notice ^^).but I don’t think she realized it,coz I made it sound like as if she was joking. then, another one told me that there is in fact a patient in the icu.my heart started pounding happily @ the fact that he was the one taking care of them.but that’s just momentarily.coz after I learned who was the chief in charge, I was a bit jittery.let’s just say that we’re not that…er…close as friends.she snapped me for being not to concern about her patients.she raised her voice & told me to wait for her in the icu. phew, what a way to start your day!!
… eventually, I went there together with my co-worker,who also has been summoned there.of course,I’m a bit scared of what will she says,coz I’ve always hated when people raise their voices @ me,even if it’s for my own good.but thank heaven I was facing this together with my friend,so it gave me a little strength to face her. as we got there, I saw him still wearing his t-shirt,chatting with her while giving order to the others in the room.I’ve never saw the icu that busy before.but thanks to that,she doesn’t seem mad @ all.in fact, she taught us about what’s going on.I was amazed myself about it though,coz she never ever did that to me….but then again,maybe I was just being a little…intimidated by her,that’s all.sure hope this will turn out to be a very good beginning for some new bonding…yeah,we’ll see ’bout that…
…anyways…a few minutes after that, my friend left the room & left me with them.since I’m not used to her presence, I just can’t think of what to say, other than follow her around watching what she was doing.thank God, he’s there to break the silence coz I was beginning to feel odd.they were talking about her education,experience & all, & since I don’t know what it’s like to be a resident (…yet ^^ ), I just listened @ them quietly.sometimes smiled when it sounds funny, even though I still don’t understand what the hell they’re talking about 🙂 …but again, thank God, there’s still an angel left in this world.he sometimes made eye contact @ me while talking or joking ’bout something,while the other didn’t seem to notice @ all. I was like,”wow! how cute was that of him to made me feel like I’m still involved in this conversation”. ^_^ hihihihi…
…after awhile, he got up & continued to do his work again coz he still have an unfinished business to do with the patient,leaving me with her behind.since I still dunno what to talk about,I got up & tried to see what he was doing instead 😉 I’m still curious about how he did what he did anyways, coz I hardly got the chance to see anyone put a cvp on a patient when I was still learning.even after I worked in this hospital, I hardly ever see him did it.coz each time I wanted to,there’s always a call from the ward & I just can’t ignore that,can I ? no matter how bad I wanted to spend a couple of minutes with him in the same room ^^
…anyways…as they were getting ready, suddenly his cellphone rang. since almost everybody got their hands full with something,except me (& her,of course,but he wouldn’t want to be rude & ask her ’bout what he was going to ask next),he asked me to help him get his cell for him. @ first, I was a bit shocked realizing this, coz even though there’s another nurse standing beside him, still handsfree & all, he manage to let me ‘help’ him out. when we were close enough, I asked him where did he put it. he said,”here, it’s in my pants front pocket”. HIS WHAT??!! if it were just another guy, I wouldn’t careless about it.but this one could get tricky ^^…still with a slight disbelief ( & a red face on my half ^_^), I tried to reach in. but before that, she manage to make a joke ’bout it,saying,”be careful where you put ur hand”. my face even got much hotter than before she said that.luckily I manage to regain my cool & said to him as lightly as I can,”I’m very sorry,doc.but if there’s anything happened, I’m not responsible for it.your the one asking for it”. does that count as flirting? well, a friend of mine thought so ^^ xixixi…we didn’t look @ each other as I reach in his pocket.he looked away while I was concentrating not to let myself trembling in front of those other people in the room. that would be most embarrassing. not wanting to stay in an odd situation for long,I quickly manage to grab his cell in a matter of seconds.it was from someone that he didn’t want to accept it @ the time,so he told me to click the busy switch & that was that.. phew, that was new 😉
…after another half an hour or so, she left the room having said & written all the instruction on the patients status.after that, he remained there for another hour.I stayed back coz it’s also in my job description to do so…and the fact that I just don’t wanna miss my moment with him 😛 … it was high noon @ the time. so, I tried to make small talks to him. but apparently, it came out somehow…flirtatious ? I asked him why don’t he just stay & join me for a meal,coz it’s only some hours left before the end of fasting that day.he just smiled & said,”nah! I’m eating out with my friends later”.by that remark, I saw him making signs with one of the nurses which I quickly took as he was going to have a meal with the rest of the icu members. I was a bit jealous at it,so I said,”yaaa…when is going to be my turn then?”. I realized I was jealous at it, coz I said it with my childish tone. like I always do when I want to have things gone my way :P…
…a few moment of silence later, he asked me about my job activities. @ first, he asked his favorite question of all time ( or so I thought 🙂 ).”when do you usually came to work here?”, that was his question. inside I was like,”come on,man! is there nothing else would you rather wanna ask about? it felt like a million times I answered about it too”. but of course I didn’t say it out loud,not wanting to hurt his feeling in any way again. I just answered it politely, & it kept the conversation long enough for us, until he finally left 😦 … *sigh* …
when I told about this to my friend, she says that maybe he’s just being shy, but trying to kept his cool at the same time when I told him about when is our turn to have a meal together.which then made him to asked the same question all over again. I wish it was true, coz come to think of it, that’s just so cute of him to do so ^_^ xixixixixi…
…anyways, I went on the rest of the day working like hell. but with the previous memory in mind, I can’t help but thank God that I came there that day ^^ .. I just hope that this means that I’m getting another step closer to him in a way & vice versa 😉
Amin…

who do u think u are? making me feel this way…

what r u thinking right now? sleepy,I guess 🙂

what r u thinking when u look @ me? just another comrade, I guess

what makes me fall for u that day? is it coz of  ur kindness, gentleness, smart,fun person? almost everything about u intrigues me…

what’s so special about u that I can’t stop thinking about? I dunno…

what really happened that day? should’ve listened to my head more, coz look…

what’s happening 2 me these days?

’bout 2 days ago, I woke up in the middle of the day by the sound of an incoming message from my cell.I picked it up & see who it was.It was my friend from the hospital. at first,I thought she was about to give me another med check-up job,as usual.lazily,I opened it.it turned out that it wasn’t a job offering at all.she asked when I’d be coming to work.sounds just simple as that?
…nope…there’s something more.she also added that she has something for me from the boss’s wife,a pic.suddenly,I had a rush of blood flowing through my head.was it the pic taken from the other day at the wedding,I thought.as I recall the event back then,she did manage to take a pic of us..meaning me,them,…& him,too 🙂 I got up all excited.wondering which one would she’d given.I was so surprised I could hear my heart thumpin’ even faster & louder.why??
well,this was all very…unexpected event. you see, ’bout a few months back @ the beach, I tried to take a pic of him secretly w/o him noticing,for my own guilty pleasure.but failed miserably.there just weren’t any chance to do it.when there were a chance,I got interrupted so many times that I just forgot about it,thinking what’s the use anyway.
and now…all of the sudden,an opportunity just came out of nowhere. an opportunity to really have a pic of him,w/o having to feel guilty ’bout it. it got me all psych on my way to work 😉
after arriving at work, went to the ladies room for awhile to freshened up a bit.there,I met my friend who contacted me earlier that day.after saying hi, she gave me an envelope with my name written on it.she said it was a cute pic. I couldn’t wait to look at it, so I opened it up right there immediately.there’s only 1 pic in it,but that’s enough to satisfy me though.it was a pic taken of all the 7 of us together,including him & me in it. my face turned red & I could feel my heart instantly skipped a bit.this is exactly what I was looking for 😀 I was so glad that my friend didn’t know about this, not a single clue. ;P aside from that,she also told me that she also had another one stored for him & she was wondering how to give it to him.eventually,she said that maybe she’ll just put it in the OR for him to retrieve it.her remark gave me another boost of adrenaline.I was like,”what?!she gave him,too?for real?”.but of course,I managed to put on a show as if it were just a natural thing to do.on second thought,it’s natural,right?we were in the same pic anyway…
..the rest of the day, I kept wondering whether this was all just a mere ‘weird coincidence’…or was it ‘fate’ that intervened ?? whichever it was,it really,really made my day.it gave me a good boost of energy for work all day.I can’t wait to tell someone about it.I just HAD to tell someone ’bout it 🙂
luckily that night one of my best friends were online,so I chatted with her…for almost 4 hours maybe (including some minor ‘interruptions’.I was working that day,duh…). I did most of the chatting obviously, coz I told her that I’ve got some breaking news ’bout my love-life 🙂 told her about what happened at the party & other stuff concerning him. she was happy to hear that I was happy & sometimes teased about it a bit.
..but from all the things we’ve talked about,there’s one thing that she said bugged me,even up until now. remember the day when he didn’t talk or even look at me just once? well, she said that maybe…probably, he was ‘testing’ me.I was shocked to hear that.I’ve never really thought of it that way.now that she mentioned it, I was like, really? are you sure? coz there’s no way that he could feel that way about me a few months ago.we’ve just met for a couple of times back then.she said that she’d been given the same treatment sometime ago when she was out with someone,before they even dated. and eventually,he mentioned about it to her after they dated 🙂 I was surprised at the thought. could this really be true ? could we be heading the same path here ? who knows ? she also mentioned that there need to be a 3rd party for 2 people to come together in the end.so maybe, just maybe, the boss’s wife acted as the 3rd person here.I kinda agreed with her at that point. I wondered if she noticed me blushing at that time…or maybe that’s just the way she is. you know,for her to give this pic to us & all.although I don’t know for sure whether she also gave it to the other ones.it would be interesting to know if we were the only ones to get it from her.coz that would be totally embarassing for me ^^ … & yet, I’m very thankful & very much in debt to her for doing so, whether she realized it or not 🙂
…aaarrrggghh!!..it’s just given me even more speculations swirling inside my head…but if it were true….wouldn’t it be wonderful ?? 🙂 who knows ? someday maybe, we’ll know…& I hope we really are heading for the same path.I hope it won’t be long now.wish me luck 😉 Amin…