eve winchester’s Blog

Archive for August 2009

…just watched the Discovery channel a few hours ago about “the science of sex appeal”.interesting them…very insightful even πŸ™‚
the were discussing about how people from can like each other, fall in love,etc. is it just came from pure physical attractiveness, or are there are many other things that makes a human attracted to another human of the opposite sex.
well…it seems like there are much that involves when a person is attracted to other people, or even fall in love. the first one they tested are the physical attractiveness of a person (do they really have to test this? the results are obvious,you know:)). surely,our eyes are the first thing that came to contact with other beings / things besides ourselves in every day life. it turns out that people who are considered to be beautiful / handsome are the ones who got many invites from other people of the opposite sex.this wasn’t surprising to all of us I think,coz we all know of these things without having the pro’s to show their research.
the 2nd test was about people’s figures. does a person who looks beautiful / handsome to a lot of people always has a good figure? or is there something else involves (such as a person’s occupation,social status,etc) ?
well,this research came out interesting. some of the guys are given a false identity (as to their jobs). the result was that even though you’re not that handsome / beautiful, the opposite will grade you much more higher than those who just depends on their looks alone with not much money in their pocket.this wasn’t so surprising, I think.if it was just for fun or short-term relationship, maybe I’ll take the handsome ones home too,without having to see their pocket πŸ˜‰ but for a long-term relationship (a.k.a marriage), that’s a whole different thing. the research said that women tend to see men who were safe & stable (financially), no matter how they look like.I agreed with this one,coz as a woman myself, of course I don’t want to have a partner that couldn’t support me (or our family), & leaving me to do all the work,while he lazed around. hmmm, I think that’s why woman sometimes can be misjudged as a ‘material girl’, don’t you think ?? πŸ˜‰
the next test was about the voice.can a person’s voice makes other more like-able than the others? the volunteers were presented with some voices of the opposite sex in various type of voices.the result was that men tend to like women who has a much higher pitch type of voice, coz they presumed that women with that type of voice were much more sexier (& therefore, much more beautiful).while the women thinks that a man with a much deeper voice were much more sexier (therefore, handsome) than the ones who has a higher tone. hmmm…this is a research I can relate,too. it so happens that the guy I like lately has a much deeper tone of voice than others I’ve met these days,hi3x ;P
anways… the next test was about how a person walks or move. they divided the volunteers to the ones who knew that they were being tested about their sexiness & the ones who doesn’t. as it turns out, the volunteers who were told about what the test was for tends to walks differently then the ones who don’t know.for the men, they tend to broadened their shoulders to show how masculine they are,while the other just let their upper limbs fall relax on the side. for the women, they tend to make their body sway much more than the ones who didn’t knew, as to tell the opposite sex that they’re sexy. in this case, I didn’t specifically notice this when I was walking with him or saw him walked in front of me. hmmm, better pay much more attention then the next time we meet πŸ˜‰
next is about the scent…thousands of years ago,people may have already knew that a certain scent can make you feel more powerful, attractive to other people. thus,a person can be drawn to you just because you have this specific scent. this type of mating are most common found in the animal world. they used it whenever they wanted to mate. the men are asked to run on a treadmill to produce sweat (odor) as much as they can.after they’ve finished,they put off their clothes and scientists stored it in a different jar each. then the women are being asked which scent that they’re most attracted to.as it turns out,different women chose different type of odor which they feel more attracted to. this means that a specific person produce a specific odor that can only be considered as a mate for a specific person too. besides that, a woman’s cycle turns out to also have a role in defining this type of smell. a woman who were in their ovulation stage or in their cycle has a more sensitive reaction towards smell. therefore,the role of the hormone here (namely estrogen) is quite important.the same goes for men with their hormone (but without the ‘cycle’, of course :D). when they like / feel attracted to someone, they release an amount of testosterone through their smell as to attract the female.
…hmmm, this is also an experience that I can relate too πŸ˜‰ . a few months ago I didn’t even realized about this.so, when it hit me, I just thought,”man,am I getting animalistic all of the sudden?”. I mean, I’m not supposed to like this guy coz I still don’t know ’bout his status & all.but after he was all freshened up,well..there’s this stupid voice on the back of my head who kept saying things like,”oh wow! he smells awesome,nice,etc”. and this rarely happened to me…moi…well,maybe once or twice.but that’s just it. I didn’t expect much from them.why this one is different than the others according to me? well, let’s continue with what scientists had to say next here πŸ™‚
the next thing they observed was ‘the touch’. when a person touches another person of the opposite gender whom they like, a certain hormone made all their senses much more sensitive towards the other. the men also produces more testosterone added to their odor to attract the female.
so, this means that whether we realized it or not, our bodies were the first ones to noticed these signals all along. but how can a person fall in love? what’s the science behind that?
scientists ran an MRI test on some volunteers who were in love and this is what they’ve found. they explained that there’s a specific part of our brain (in the nucleus caudatus) which produces many hormones, one of them is dopamine, in a specific amount that makes you like the other person. dopamine were also produced when you’re feeling happy or excited about something, such as endorphins. this is what drove you to fall in love.
so,what makes you & me,& all the people around the world to fall in love with a, as they say, ‘special’ someone ? well…all of the above combined together…& faith that there will always be that special person for each one of us in this world. so,don’t give up on hope yet. just try, try & try … & you’ll finally get there ^______^
be seeing you next time… πŸ˜€

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who do u think u are? making me feel this way…

what r u thinking right now? sleepy,I guess πŸ™‚

what r u thinking when u look @ me? just another comrade, I guess

what makes me fall for u that day? is it coz ofΒ  ur kindness, gentleness, smart,fun person? almost everything about u intrigues me…

what’s so special about u that I can’t stop thinking about? I dunno…

what really happened that day? should’ve listened to my head more, coz look…

what’s happening 2 me these days?

’bout 2 days ago, I woke up in the middle of the day by the sound of an incoming message from my cell.I picked it up & see who it was.It was my friend from the hospital. at first,I thought she was about to give me another med check-up job,as usual.lazily,I opened it.it turned out that it wasn’t a job offering at all.she asked when I’d be coming to work.sounds just simple as that?
…nope…there’s something more.she also added that she has something for me from the boss’s wife,a pic.suddenly,I had a rush of blood flowing through my head.was it the pic taken from the other day at the wedding,I thought.as I recall the event back then,she did manage to take a pic of us..meaning me,them,…& him,too πŸ™‚ I got up all excited.wondering which one would she’d given.I was so surprised I could hear my heart thumpin’ even faster & louder.why??
well,this was all very…unexpected event. you see, ’bout a few months back @ the beach, I tried to take a pic of him secretly w/o him noticing,for my own guilty pleasure.but failed miserably.there just weren’t any chance to do it.when there were a chance,I got interrupted so many times that I just forgot about it,thinking what’s the use anyway.
and now…all of the sudden,an opportunity just came out of nowhere. an opportunity to really have a pic of him,w/o having to feel guilty ’bout it. it got me all psych on my way to work πŸ˜‰
after arriving at work, went to the ladies room for awhile to freshened up a bit.there,I met my friend who contacted me earlier that day.after saying hi, she gave me an envelope with my name written on it.she said it was a cute pic. I couldn’t wait to look at it, so I opened it up right there immediately.there’s only 1 pic in it,but that’s enough to satisfy me though.it was a pic taken of all the 7 of us together,including him & me in it. my face turned red & I could feel my heart instantly skipped a bit.this is exactly what I was looking for πŸ˜€ I was so glad that my friend didn’t know about this, not a single clue. ;P aside from that,she also told me that she also had another one stored for him & she was wondering how to give it to him.eventually,she said that maybe she’ll just put it in the OR for him to retrieve it.her remark gave me another boost of adrenaline.I was like,”what?!she gave him,too?for real?”.but of course,I managed to put on a show as if it were just a natural thing to do.on second thought,it’s natural,right?we were in the same pic anyway…
..the rest of the day, I kept wondering whether this was all just a mere ‘weird coincidence’…or was it ‘fate’ that intervened ?? whichever it was,it really,really made my day.it gave me a good boost of energy for work all day.I can’t wait to tell someone about it.I just HAD to tell someone ’bout it πŸ™‚
luckily that night one of my best friends were online,so I chatted with her…for almost 4 hours maybe (including some minor ‘interruptions’.I was working that day,duh…). I did most of the chatting obviously, coz I told her that I’ve got some breaking news ’bout my love-life πŸ™‚ told her about what happened at the party & other stuff concerning him. she was happy to hear that I was happy & sometimes teased about it a bit.
..but from all the things we’ve talked about,there’s one thing that she said bugged me,even up until now. remember the day when he didn’t talk or even look at me just once? well, she said that maybe…probably, he was ‘testing’ me.I was shocked to hear that.I’ve never really thought of it that way.now that she mentioned it, I was like, really? are you sure? coz there’s no way that he could feel that way about me a few months ago.we’ve just met for a couple of times back then.she said that she’d been given the same treatment sometime ago when she was out with someone,before they even dated. and eventually,he mentioned about it to her after they dated πŸ™‚ I was surprised at the thought. could this really be true ? could we be heading the same path here ? who knows ? she also mentioned that there need to be a 3rd party for 2 people to come together in the end.so maybe, just maybe, the boss’s wife acted as the 3rd person here.I kinda agreed with her at that point. I wondered if she noticed me blushing at that time…or maybe that’s just the way she is. you know,for her to give this pic to us & all.although I don’t know for sure whether she also gave it to the other ones.it would be interesting to know if we were the only ones to get it from her.coz that would be totally embarassing for me ^^ … & yet, I’m very thankful & very much in debt to her for doing so, whether she realized it or not πŸ™‚
…aaarrrggghh!!..it’s just given me even more speculations swirling inside my head…but if it were true….wouldn’t it be wonderful ?? πŸ™‚ who knows ? someday maybe, we’ll know…& I hope we really are heading for the same path.I hope it won’t be long now.wish me luck πŸ˜‰ Amin…

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  • Comments Off on an ‘almost’ perfect night out

…had an ‘almost’ perfect night tonight…why almost?…

well,it goes like this…

I went to a colleague’s wedding @ Gran Mahakam Hotel tonight.as usual,I went there all by myself.since none of my colleagues lives nearby,I tookΒ  a cab there. Otw,I kept hoping that he’ll show up as well.as I was about to enter the ballroom,I took a quick glance inside searching for any familiar faces.quickly,I stumbled on his presence there,standing alongside the boss & his wife. don’t know why,I just suddenly had the urge to make way without them noticing.it was effortless,coz he saw me already.u know,the way he noticed was kinda funny if I may say so.why?

…as I was effortlessly trying to evade them by hiding behind someone in front of me & there’s also a tree between me & them,he kinda make an extra effort to see whose coming.I found it kinda cute,that’s all ^_^ can’t stop myself from smiling…

anyway, after he noticed me,he gave a smile & I think he told the others that I came as well.I smiled back seeing that by now I can’t just go unnoticed,so I joined them.the boss’s wife was the first one I said hi too, coz she is the nearest one standing @ that time.I shook her hand & her husband’s,but not him.now that I realized that,I don’t know why I didn’t shake hands with him…hmmm,come to think of it,maybe I guess it’s coz I already saw him as a good friend,I didn’t do the obvious.eventhough he is still a superior 2 me..in a way…

back to the main story…so,after we shook hands,she asked me an obvious question.about with whom did I came with.I was prepared for this one.I answered it with a little bit of joke.I said,”well,apparently the invitation was meant ONLY for me,so why should I bother to bring anyone else?”.it gave them a chuckle for awhile.then she said that it’s fine.suddenly,out of the blue, he started saying,”it’s OK.I’ll accompany you tonight.We’re here on the same boat anyways.” he said while smiling silly which meant to be a joke, and the others joined in as well.but what was I thinking @ that moment you might ask?…

well,I was shocked beyond beliefs!! that’s how I truely felt inside.there I was hoping,praying,day & night to make him notice me more than just a mereΒ  colleague.and there he was saying out loud that he’s considering to accompany me…I repeat, ME…tonight.even if it was just meant to be a joke.meanwhile,on the outside, I only had a couple of seconds to regain myself & laugh with them,acting as though it was just another silly comment.I even added some spice,asking them if they approved of it.the boss’s wife even said,”you’ve got his approval”. if it were in the comics,there would be a huge bubble on top of my head with a picture of me dancing in circles, shouting,”yes 3x !! I finally hit the jackpot!!”. πŸ˜€

after that intro,they continued on their conversations about the hospital products & all.I pretend to took interest in what they’re saying,while along the way,I was only trying to find a way to glance @ him a couple of times without being seen to straight-forward.^^ I just can’t help myself,hi3x…

after some 15 minutes or so,they announced that the bride & the groom were about to enter.after another couple of minutes, they walked in.meanwhile, as I turned my head to where he was standing,@ the back I saw some nurses from the hospital just came by & he was greeting them.there were 5 of them altogether,plus one of their kid.moments later ,I went to join them to say hi.the same question was thrown @ me once again,with who did I came with.I answered it exactly the same as I did before.I shook their hands without knowing why do I have to do so.one of them even said,”hey,why are u all shaking hands?who’s the one having a celebration here?maybe it’s for you & the doctor here,doc”, she said pointing @ me. hearing that,my heart skip a beat.I was caught of guard @ their remarks.but as usual,I manage to put on what’s little dignity I have left & told them in what I hope was a relaxing tone,”come on,guys!don’t u dare start any rumours about it”.I think I still manage to blush at the remark.coz after that,another one said,”aww,come on,doc!!you’re perfect for each other.he’s single,you’re single.you even wear the same color tonight.what else could it be?”.like a cat caught in my tongue,I didn’t manage to answer back.all I did say was,”why you…”, blushing even more.I hope nobody noticed it.^^ I didn’t even notice that we were wearing the same color tonight,until she said that.well,not exactly the same color.just the basic color anyways.he wore a red shirt with squares on it,while I was wearing my fav pink dress.@ that time,I even thought,”hmmm,they could be right”.I wanted to say that it’s because we’ve already agreed on it before,but I just can seem to bring it out of my mouth,even if it was only meant for a joke.don’t know why,but I was kinda…frightened to say it.strange coz days ago when I wore the same color as the groom,I can joke about it freely…but of course, I quickly took it as just some mere happy coincidence. ;P

then it was time to cut the cake.one of the nurse brought a digital camera with her & wanted to take a pic at it.he suddenly came again & asked her to help take the pic.by now, I already know that he’ll be taking not just the main pic,but all of what’s been goin’ on @ the moment.of course,I can’t help but seize the moment too for my own benefit,hi3x ^^ as I suspected,he took some pics of us like crazy,almost forgetting the main event.thank God it was digital,or else I’d feel sorry for her.he took a pic of me & the owner of the camera once.I was so shy that even I pretended that I was looking @ the happy couple & not notice what he was aiming at.that was my 1st stupid move tonight.uc,I should’ve grasp the chance & make it like I was having a fun time being taken a pic that way.instead,I shied away,like I always did when I’m feeling insecure. 😦

after congratulating the happy couple,everyone’s making their way to the food tables. (oh yeah,btw,he already had an ice cream before congratulating them.boy,that guy surely never stop to amaze me one way or the other,hi3x ^_^) . he said something funny when I met him while waiting for the crepes.uc, he was looking…no,I think the word staring is much more preferable in this case.^^ he was staring @ the people who were waiting in line for the crepes.I called him,& after he came by, I told him,”come on,doc!quit staring & get in line if u wanna grab a bite”.in a lively voice,of course.he said that he didn’t wanna wait in a long line,but he joined & kept me company anyways ^_^ he told me how the boss’ were lookin @ him as he ate the spaghetti.I told him,”and why not?.anyone who’d seen the way u eat will also feel how much u enjoyed it.just don’t forget to breathe,doc”.he just laughed at my remarks.when it was my turn,the chef had to cook another one,so we waited for a few more moments.don’t know why,I felt like havin a cold (maybe that’s coz I am freezing,silly^^). he made a joke on it & said,”there,there.no need to cry about it.there you go”. havin’ said that, he went along again.

after that, I was eating something while just chillin’ out with the nurses,when one of them asked where i’d be goin’ home & with whom.I told them that i’d be goin back the same way I came.one of them offered to join them using the grand max from the hospital.I politely refuse their offer,coz we weren’t heading for the same way anyways.just as we were talking on that topic,he came by & joined us.suddenly,one of the nurses interrupted & said,”or maybe you wanna go back with him?”.Once again I was caught by surprise.I don’t know how to react to that.before i could think of any answer, he quickly said,”it’s fine by me.where are you headed anyway?”.and once again,if it were in a comic book,there would be the same bubble pop up on my head like before. he was actually sincerely invited me to join him on the way back.yippi-ka-yay ^___^

…but again fate intervened.I guessΒ  it wasn’t the right time to bring him home with me, coz as soon as I told him my destination,he was taken aback. as I saw his facial expression, it broke my heart.I know he was just being polite & all, wouldn’t even notice how I felt much. but how I really wished that I had a home near the hospital…*sigh* 😦

since I hadn’t had my ice cream yet, i went on searching for one in the ballroom.after I got it,I got back to the other room,searching for a familiar faces (namely him,duuh ^^ ).no sight.so,I just enjoyed my ice in the middle of the room,still looking for a familiar face.at last, he showed up.I called @ him,but I guess he didn’t heard it.but I’m pretty sure he saw me though,clearly even.since I just don’t wanna get my hopes up again,I just pretended that he didn’t hear.but suddenly,a familiar voice from behind asked me where the others are.by now,I recognize that voice by heart.it was him.he came by again.I told him that they were still having another round.now here comes my 2nd stupidity.wait for it…wait for it…& he’s gone.out of the picture.by the time I finished & went on searching for him,he’s nowhere to be seen…why in the world didn’t I asked him to wait for me for awhile?? wasn’t this the opportunity that i’ve been seeking for all this time?why did I ever let it slip through my fingers just like that? hix3x 😦 I just had to 2 forget the reason for coming tonight..*sigh*..is this His way of trying to tell me to take 1 step at a time & not to rush things? dunno ’bout that…an old friend of mine just had to be the one who reminded me of my stupidity.huphhh, wish I could rewind the time…

…nah…gotta move forward.no use of feeling regrets.gotta grasp what I have today for tomorrow is a whole brand new day to start.at least now I know that he’s much more comfortable & relax near me.that’s a good sign,yes?? ganbatte kurosai !!! ^^


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